Drugs and Sex

A lot of people wonder what happened to all the old sites of the web. It seems you almost never find something from the early days anymore. There’s a good reason for that and it’s only partly because no one links to or reads old stuff. That good reason is that most of the early web was porn. And you can’t find it because those sites are all gone. Where you can find it, however, is in books, (yes, dead-tree books) that people wrote around that time and which serve as the only decent records of what happened back then. And since I mostly talk about pop music or other silly things here, instead of what’s really dominant on the internet (porn,) think of this as a corrective to that overlooking. But first, some fun with drugs since sex and drugs seem to go together like peas and carrots.

Note: More 7-11 fun is still in store. (Pun intended)

 

Drugs:

 

A happy life is a drug-free life.

Love begins at the rejection of drugs. (And judging by the location of this wall, drugs apparently start in Banqiao.)

 

Sex:

情色男女網路站

編著: 章道安 朱怡陶

Pornographic web sites

Editors: Zhāng Dàoān, Zhū Yítáo

p.47

Tokyo Topless

http://www.bekkoame.or.jp/~adolf/web/home.html

Last Update: Aug 28, 1996

Headlines

歡迎來到日本的熱血王牌站台，肉體橫陳，美女如排山倒海般向你撲來，高血壓及心髒病患者要預防發生意外。血壓方剛的青年，更不要忘了先拿棉花把鼻孔塞好，以免到時候...。

Welcome to Japan's hottest web site. Here you'll find enough skin and beauties at your service to kill a small horse. However, friend, beware: this page is not for the faint of heart. Those with high blood pressure or heart disease should take the necessary precautions to ensure their personal safety. For those of you just reaching manhood, don't forget to stick some tissues up your nose. It can help to avoid problems that may arise in the near future, if you catch my drift.

---

And because we cover language here, here’s one of the many hidden treasures from this book:

p.140

性愛英語

大公開

任何一種語言最難精通的部份就是俚語了，但是往往在學會以後便成為您日常生活中最常用、也是最有用的部份。以下的每一個字彙可說是字字珠璣，絕對需要您去熟讀背誦、反覆練習，才能達到爐火純青的地步。英文是國際語言，一旦練就一身好本領，您馬上就可以在成人站台裡上山下海，有如神龍活現般的悠遊其中。在您看完了各國紅燈區旅遊資訊之後，是否有立刻出國一遊的衝動？只要帶著這套字彙，再也不會有各國美女當前，而只有能膛目結舌、不知所云的悲慘狀況發生，這時宣揚國威的重責大任就拜託您了。

Sexual Terminology in English

Everything you need to know.

The toughest part of any language is surely its slang. But it often happens that this part of the language is what you come to use more than anything else day to day. And it's this part of the language that often is the most useful. Each term below can be thought of as a precious jewel. Take time to memorize each and every one. Only through repetition and practice can you attain perfection in their usage.  English is an international language. Your mastery of its particulars are a skill you can carry with you for all your days. But, first and foremost, you can use them to swim in vast sea of adult sites to your heart's content. After reading about each country's red light district, you're probably feeling the sudden urge to pay each one a visit, right? With this trusty phrasebook at your side you won't ever be stuck with a beautiful foreign lady at your side, completely unable to communicate. Nothing less than the prestige of our nation demands that you get these words right. Good luck.